yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize
