So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
