I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
