Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize