Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I touched a dick in church today
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Randomize
