Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
