She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
