Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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