Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
