I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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