HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
