Having a random hookup so left but love u
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize
