i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
