The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize