Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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