I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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