I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
soo... how was my night?
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