This dress was meant to end up on your floor
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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