Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
