I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
