If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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