She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
