Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
