Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize