How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize
