I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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