goodnight i made you a song goodbye
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
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