But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
accomplished twins. life is a go
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
