she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
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