Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
