i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
