New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
