Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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