ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
