after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
