I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize