i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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