the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
