I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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