Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
