ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Randomize
