hotel room ftw
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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