Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
