dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
