You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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