I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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