I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
