isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
