Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
handjob tips. give me some.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Randomize
