Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
