I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
