We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize