You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize
