I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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